Sex… Stuff Every Woman Should Know and Every Straight Man Wants to.

Emily Ullrich is a writer, filmmaker, occasional stand-up comedian, and... read more

A good anatomy lesson might be the gateway to orgasmic sexual pleasure that you are looking for. If you’re a female, these hints can be just what you need to achieve maximum pleasure, and if you’re a male, this lesson may be what you need in order to really please your girl. [spoiler title=”Summary: Click to Read” style=”fancy”] Whether you have been having sex for 30 days or 30 years, there are always new things to learn in the bedroom. However, some of the most important things we can learn for ultimate pleasure are actually from the female body. If you’re a girl looking for an orgasmic experience, or a guy that wants to make sure his girl doesn’t have to fake it, make sure you learn everything you can about the “Magic Spots”: the clitoris, G-Spot, A-Spot, and U-Spot. Utilizing these Magic Spots to their full potential will give you an orgasm that you never even dreamed possible. [/spoiler] Some time in my early twenties, I realized that men were not just going to “know” how to please me sexually. At first, I thought that guys who were “good” should just know what they were doing…and to some extent, that’s true. However, for the most part, even the most experienced and knowledgeable guy needs some guidance. Every girl is different. He can know everything about anatomy, but girls, you are in charge of your own orgasm!

Magic Spots

As most women do these days, I knew about the clitoris, but I had only heard of the G-spot and Kegel exercises. I had never even heard anything yet of the a-spot or the u-spot, and I certainly had no idea that women could ejaculate. I began paying attention when Discovery aired sex shows on television, I read about female anatomy, and I tried stuff. More importantly…I learned stuff.  I learned things that my lovers were not always keen to partake in. I found that you have to be fairly assertive with guys that age if you want to have an orgasm the way I did. I was instructing one young lad, as he drilled at my vagina like a jackrabbit, “Slow down!” I said. “Dude” he pleaded, “Why can’t you just let me do my own thing?” Needless to say, I let him “do his own thing,” …at his own house. g-spotLet’s start with some basics, and then we’ll get to the nitty-gritty.  First, everyone is different—their preferences, their genetics, their anatomy. Our vaginas are like snowflakes. Women’s ideas about what is too gentle or too rough may surprise you, and you might even surprise yourself as you begin to experiment. That said, there are some certainties that you can rely on, if you are willing to do your homework. One thing that is true almost across the board is that you can never go too slow or be too gentle in the beginning, at least until you know what you want. By now, I hope you all know what and where the clitoris is. If not, Google it… I’ll wait–seriously. Girls and guys, I am amazed at how many of you have been having sex for years, and don’t know where or what the clit is. If you’re a girl who doesn’t know, you probably have never had a full-blown orgasm. And if you are a straight guy still having sex under the assumption that you can bring a girl to orgasm just through penetration, you have had girls fake orgasm.  Imagine having just the shaft of your penis and your balls played with, and being expected to get off…that is the equivalent of ignoring the clit. I hate to be the barer of bad news, but that is a fact. The clitoris is basically a tiny penis.  At gestation, we are unisex creatures. Our organs form from the same tissue, which either becomes a penis and testicles, or a clitoris and lips – a vagina. I have had more than one female adult friend who said she couldn’t achieve orgasm. When I asked them about their clits, they didn’t know where or what it was.  I literally made them take off their pants, and showed them. Girls, there’s no shame in getting out a mirror, finding it, and then using it.  And guys, I doubt your chick will mind if you want to get down there and inspect things closely. It should be noted that just because you know where the clitoris, G-spot, A-spot, and U-spot are, that you still haven’t mastered female sexual pleasure. They are not magic buttons that, when pushed, light us up with fiery orgasm. They must be plucked, stroked, spanked, or treated in whatever fashion the woman likes (this is where time and experimentation come in) in order to achieve the goal.


woman G-spotMy most recent knowledge changed a lot about what I thought I knew.  Those of us who are “informed” have known for some time that the G-spot (or Grafenberg spot—named after the scientist who discovered it) is a bundle of nerves at the other end of the clit, on the inside of the frontal wall of the vagina, about one and a half to two inches in. That is still true, but recently a group of scientists have found that there are nerves that travel in a figure-eight shape around the clitoris and vaginal opening. According to this theory, the “line” of nerves crosses at this point (where the G-spot is) so it’s like strumming two guitar strings. The vibration that the nerves make against one another brings pleasure to the woman.


Knowing about the clit and the G-spot is far from all there is to know. I thought I knew it all until I spoke to some friends who said that they “squirted” during orgasm. I did not think that I was one of these people. Then, I found out we are all capable of this…it just doesn’t happen in the same way, and more importantly in the same amount. This is where the “A”-Spot comes in, which stands for the ” AFE-zone or Anterior Fornix Erogenous Zone. Also referred to as the Epicentre, this is a patch of sensitive tissue at the inner end of the vaginal tube between the cervix and the bladder, described technically as the “female degenerated prostate.” In other words, it is the female equivalent of the male prostate, just as the clitoris is the female equivalent of the male penis. Direct stimulation of this spot can produce violent orgasmic contractions. Unlike the clitoris, it is not supposed to suffer from “post-orgasmic over-sensitivity.” (Desmond Morris, The Naked Woman: A Study of the Female Body)  So, yes guys… you have a G-spot, too—the prostate—which when stroked properly also produces orgasm.


Lastly, the U-spot is a small patch of sensitive erectile tissue located just above and on either side of the urethral opening. It is absent just below the urethra, in the small area between the urethra and the vagina. The U-Spot is not as well known as the clitoris, and because of this American clinical research workers only recently investigated its erotic potential.  “They found that if this region was gently caressed, with the finger, the tongue, or the tip of the penis, there was an unexpectedly powerful erotic response.” (Desmond Morris, The Naked Woman: A Study of the Female Body) sexThis information is a lot to chew on, (gently, please) so to say.  Take any or all of the above, and do with it what you will. I’m sure some of you probably have something to add, and I’d love to hear it!  And, some of you may have questions. I’d love to hear them, too.